In this inspiring episode, we sit down with Melanie, a vegan powerlifter whose past year has been marked by massive life changes, personal growth, and record-setting strength.
She opens up about navigating divorce, rebuilding her life, discovering the power of community, and transforming her approach to training and mindset.
With coaching insights from Sawyer and thoughtful questions from Giacomo, Melanie shares how she learned to trust herself, adapt through adversity, and ultimately achieve regional records in USA Powerlifting.
This conversation dives deep into resilience, vulnerability, and the unexpected joy that comes from embracing challenge.
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Welcome back to another episode of Vegan Protein’s Muscles by Brussels radio. My name’s Giacomo. And I’m Sawyer.
And I’m Melanie. This is the next episode. I’m not even sure.
I know with you and Ben taking over everything, I’m not sure how we’re starting this thing. But what I do want to say is thank you everyone who is tuning in and listening. You’re the reason why we do this.
And we have really exciting stuff to share. And I’m super psyched to see what kind of direction Muscles by Brussels is going to take with you and Ben behind the wheel, because you two are doing your own recording when before you even joined up and joined forces with us. So, and we have a guest here today.
But I think before we get into what we’re actually talking about, which honestly, I have no idea, but I’m totally cool with going with the flow. I just know how awesome Mel is. And I’m psyched to be reconnecting with you.
Catching up to speed with what’s going on in your worlds. How about, Melanie, the last time I was chatting with you, we got to hang out for a little bit while I was tabling at the New York city marathon. And you were telling me about your power lifting goals.
And I got to know you a little bit, but I didn’t really get to know you. Not like Sawyer did. I don’t know that you could catch me up with a full year, but what’s been going on with you?
[Mel]Gosh, it has been quite a year. Many, many changes personally. And in terms of the power lifting and so forth, a lot of good things, a lot of things that were challenges since talking with you.
Change in marriage, got divorced. Have a new place. Establish a family a little somewhere different.
Job’s still the same. Kept training through it all. It won’t say that it all went easy.
You know, it happens. And then this past fall had some really pretty decent success at the USA power lifting Southwest regionals. Yeah, that’s been keeping me busy.
[Sawyer]Decent is a light way to put it. But yes, I think you’ve overcome so much. And it’s so I’m so excited to get into it because like, by the way, guys, I’m Melanie’s coach.
I have been for the last. How long has it been now? Will be like almost a year.
Working with you has been so much fun because even though power lifting is not my wheelhouse, I just kind of deferred to you on a lot of things that I knew you knew. But I also felt like I knew some things that I could contribute and we just we really synergize well. And I think that’s part of why we were able to accomplish what you accomplished.
You know what I mean? And I appreciate you bringing up the divorce because I think that if you know, like how we talked about Jen Thompson and like how, you know, for you, it was a little bit like she’s so in the stratosphere. And then also she was competing in like lower levels and you’re kind of like, that’s kind of weird.
I love that you’re so real about the struggles that you face and that you are willing to kind of just say, hey, guys, like I’m not perfect. You know, I’ve had many struggles and I’ve had many fears. And I really want to talk about all that stuff because I think that’s the most inspiring because when we try to act like we’re untouchable and we’ve just always been this elite athlete and stuff like that, it makes us just less inspiring to people because then we’re just like not relatable to anybody else.
And so I love how real you are about what you faced on your way to this success because it was not a smooth, steady incline. You know what I mean?
[Mel]Well, yeah, yeah.
[Sawyer]But that kind of leaves me at a loss for where to start because there’s so much. There’s so much to talk about that we’ve gone through this year. Giacomo, do you have any questions since you’re kind of the newest to this conversation?
Like, what would you want to know as an audience member kind of thing?
[Giacomo]Well, I do think I’m going to be a fly on the wall for a lot of this conversation, but I’m genuinely curious to hear a different take and spin on how pushing and finding a way through is the way to get through life events, whether they’re ones that you choose or ones that you do not. I’m genuinely looking forward to getting to know you better, Melanie. I’m curious to hear why you powerlift, what continues to motivate you both inside the sport and outside the sport for personal reasons, like beyond achievement, beyond.
Yeah, I don’t want to throw too many thoughts out there, but I have a lot. But I am super curious to hear what makes you tick outside of just, well, I accomplished something, so let me talk about what I accomplished. Like, no, you went through a process to get there.
And I’m curious to know what that’s been like.
[Mel]Sure. I think if I had to give you kind of a glimpse into what makes me tick, it’s that I have my attention span is like that of a Dressel terrier, I think. I am one who changes things up a fair amount and I’m kind of always seeking for that next thing that seems fun and so forth.
And that does not mean that all the things that I kind of get myself into end up being fantastic successes. They certainly don’t. I quit a lot of things and such do along the way.
But about two years ago, I started weight training, had been doing just some basic physical training, more focused on weights because I had been running for a long time, got a stress fracture in my hip because of running on concrete, training for a marathon, and had just turned 50. My sister and I were going to do the Houston Marathon together. Well, she got stress fractures in her shin.
I got a stress fracture in my hip. Running was off the table for a while and trying to figure out, well, what do I want to do? And needed a goal of some sort.
And I’m not a ball sports kind of person. I’m really pretty uncoordinated.
[Giacomo]I can’t.
[Mel]So like the pickleball thing wasn’t going to be for me. So I made myself a goal. Let’s just try a powerlifting competition because someone I knew was doing one.
She was in Mississippi. And so I went to the gym, found a trainer there who happened to be ranked in USA powerlifting. And so I got hooked up with him and started training and did my first meet.
And it was very, very scary. And there were a lot of things that went well and some things that didn’t. Decided, well, I’d like to do another one because my strength had really gone up just a little bit of training.
You know, those beginner things where a little bit of training goes a long way at first. And so I did another one. That was great.
Then I was really into the training. And that’s when some more difficulties kind of started coming into play.
[Sawyer]Before we get into that, I just want to commend you for your openness to challenge. Like, I think that the fact that you went from marathon to powerlifting immediately. I mean, that’s unfathomable for most people, like not even just like people your age or mothers or whoever, you know, whatever.
It’s like most people, like myself included, the thought of doing either of those things is like, wow, that’s a big deal. So the fact that you were just kind of like, I need a challenge. I’m going to try a bunch of different things, I think is very commendable.
And then the fact that you actually got hooked on one of those things is even cooler because then you were able to kind of pull on that thread long enough to actually set some freaking records. Skip to the end of that story, I guess, real quick. But I just think it’s so cool.
I think it’s so cool how this started. And I actually hadn’t heard the whole story about how it just like started. I just kind of jumped in and started helping as much as I could.
But it was like, that is really cool how that how that came up. What do you think drives you to want challenge? Is that just something you’ve always been like, or is it just you think you had to grow that somehow in you?
[Mel]I think there’s always been a little bit of wanting to have that challenge or that purpose, something that’s internal. And the powerlifting in particular, I think there’s a lot more women, older women even that are getting into it because of that internal satisfaction of being able to accomplish something. And also the training is something that’s pretty self-reliant.
It’s not with a team necessarily. You can do the workouts when you get to have that time. We’re balancing a lot that happens.
Now you need spotters and things like that and stuff too. Not competing collegiately or anything like that or in the open. That’s a little different story.
But it’s really, I think it’s just that satisfying to be able to go to the gym and move a kind of weight that makes someone else look at you like, yeah, you get a kick out of that.
[Sawyer]I would do. That’s pretty awesome. No, that’s super interesting because I think, yeah, it sounds like there were a lot of points of like, OK, this kind of discipline that you have to grow, this self-reliance that you have to have, this impressiveness that it that it has, you know, on the general population.
There are a lot of things that kind of kept you going that were more internal focused. I mean, I guess that the impressing people is external. But the truth is like there’s a lot of different points like for you that kept you in it besides just like the ultimate goal of getting to the, you know, whatever the finish line is or whatever the goal is that year, you know.
[Mel]And honestly, a lot of my initial workouts, you saw them when we started training together and you looked at what I’d been doing. The volume was insane and it took a lot of time. And so it was, you know, I needed that time at that point in life.
It was a way for me to be away from the house. I’ve been working at home since the pandemic started. So you really need that outlet to be out in a way, even more so and say the relationship at home isn’t isn’t working either.
So there also was that great aspect of being able to be somewhere else in the gym, a place that I really liked doing something that felt good to me. I didn’t even notice people noticing me until probably about a year into training. And the trainer I was working with said, you know, the looks and that.
How are you feeling about that? What are you talking about?
[Sawyer]You’re so you’re so locked in. I mean, yeah, when I came into the picture and I just saw you doing all that volume, I was like, well, this chick is serious. Like she could be in the gym for a couple of hours doing all this stuff.
Like obviously was concerned about your recovery. But I was also just like impressed by the amount you’re able to put yourself through just like mentally. You know what I mean?
Like even beyond like the physical exhaustion, just you being able to be there and doing that training like day after day after day for that much volume. And obviously we ended up reducing it and it was a good thing. But it really impressed upon me right away that I was like, OK, this woman’s serious.
Like she has goals and she’s going to do what it takes to get there. And then from there was just getting to know your personality and then also obviously how you respond to training. But I like to start at the lower end of the volume spectrum and then only go up when it becomes necessary to because then it’s a lot easier to manage fatigue and stimulus because then you know you’re not doing the most that you could possibly do and then have to work backwards, which is, I think, a lot harder.
Cool. So, Giacomo, I see the cogs turning in your brain. What is the next question you have for Melanie like as this story unfolds?
You know what I mean? I want to like as the fly on the wall in this conversation, so you said, what do you think is the most next most interesting thing, like the challenges that she faced? Is that kind of where your brain goes from here?
[Giacomo]There’s a couple of things, but I want to lock in right now on the doer in you and how you hold back when you know that it’s going to get you better results, even though there’s some part of you that is adapted to and used to training with higher volume. And maybe it’s time to lower your volume because you get better results. And logically, you know that the outcome is there.
However, in theory, you know that in actuality, you have to wind up tapering back to your training or focusing more on your recovery. What do you do? What do you tap into mindset wise to accept that, embrace that and get good at that process, especially being a power lifter, which power lifting is all about pushing really hard and trying to find a way to improve your work capacity beyond no reason while you’re in pain quite often.
From my personal experience, and maybe I took the wrong approach, but that’s just my limited perspective. So yeah, that’s my question. What do you do mindset wise to accept, embrace and get really good at recovery and pulling back on your volume?
Because I get the impression that you’re the type that is OK with and maybe even needs to push really hard to enjoy what you’re doing because it’s part of the challenge, blah, blah, blah. That’s my big question right now.
[Mel]Yeah, no, you’re exactly you’re exactly right. One of the things that I really like about power lifting and the training for it is being able to do those heavy singles at the beginning of a workout where if it’s a bench day, like, OK, I’m going to warm up. And then you do a series of one reps as you build up to this one that’s going to be big for the day.
And there’s just such a neat dopamine hit that you get when you get that that heavy weight that you’re aiming for and you start to see it go up. But then all of those accessories, exercises add so much stress on the body and you can pile on a lot of volume, which is great. I was getting very strong, but I really was sore and tired and and things were starting to get into a you can start to get into a little imbalances when you if something is tired for too long, you kind of correct it in a different way.
You’re shored up in a different way, which can then cause more stress or something. So when Sawyer looked at my program and was designing one for me, did take down the volume quite a bit. I just I trusted him.
I mean, that was that was one of the things I think you have to do with a good trainer trainee relationship is is trust. And I’ve I’ve been working on a long time. It can be, you know, it can be especially, you know.
Yeah. And that that was, you know, the other personal things that were going on in my life, there were a lot of things that I couldn’t trust. This was one where I’m like, no, I’m going to trust it.
And and it feels good when you can trust like that, especially then when it when it pays off. And so I was very good about always listening and responding and adapting to and soliciting that kind of that kind of feedback, not just the numbers, but the OK, but how do you feel? Did this feel easier?
That feel not, you know, it’s getting all of those subjective things. So, yeah, a lot. I think my the mindset was really one where I was trusting that trusting my body and trusting Sawyer is working in my best interest.
Yeah.
[Sawyer]Well, I think I think personally that you have a lot of courage, Mel, like you’ve you’ve shown that in so many different situations now at this point, like personal relationships and, you know, accepting challenges and trusting. Like all these things require a lot of courage that, you know, things will work out eventually. And I think that’s part of why what we did worked, because you had to have a lot of courage to go and trust this person that you didn’t really know.
And then also, you know, try for this thing that you didn’t know if you could achieve and then you know what I mean? So it was a lot of a lot of little leaps of faith throughout that journey. But ultimately, I like what you said about adapting and like and feedback, because that’s ultimately what matters the most, right?
It’s like it doesn’t matter if even if you get it right on the first try, if the second that I designed a program for you and it was like perfect for you right in that moment, eventually it would need to change when your goals changed or when, you know, your needs changed or you had an injury or something like that. So if you don’t if you’re not adaptable in any way, it’s eventually going to be it’s like a broken clock is right, you know, twice a day, right? But it’s not going to be right all the time.
And so you have to adjust things with with both the numbers and the and like you’re saying the emotional feedback that I’m getting. So I really liked that you mentioned that because, yeah, I think that’s a part of of coaching and just like working with somebody that needs to be there, especially because like I don’t pride myself on being like a powerlifting coach either. Like I’m not I wouldn’t consider myself a powerlifting coach.
And yet here we are breaking state and regional records together because you’re a badass powerlifter and I’m a badass coach. And it was just like, cool, that was fun. Like it was a really cool experience.
But I really do really do admire the fact that you just have this this much courage to be like, I’m going to try this new thing. I’m going to see how it works out, because at the end of the day, I think you have this kind of I don’t know, maybe it’s self belief. Maybe you can correct me if I’m wrong.
You have this self belief or maybe it’s like a more more spiritual thing where you’re like, I think things are going to work out eventually. I’m going to learn or I’m going to win or both. You know what I mean?
Is that kind of the attitude that you go into things with where you’re like, I’m scared, but like it’s probably going to work out kind of thing?
[Mel]I think that’s one of the things I’ve learned through this whole powerlifting journey, honestly, because otherwise I really would have been pretty a lot more uptight and really trying to control it and really pushing through it, you know, and just always drive, drive, drive and then be disappointed when it didn’t work or have it just fall apart continually. And so when I learned to back off a bit with the training, with the intensity, with the mindset in terms of I don’t have to have this all preplanned in my head and have everything go completely according to plan. I can handle a setback.
Maybe it’s not even a setback, but just learning to let things wash over a little bit more has been, I think the powerlifting has been cathartic for that and bringing it into everything else in life as well.
[Sawyer]Well, I think two things I want to say about that is like one is that life is going to humble us all, right? We think we have a plan for our lives and then you get hit, you get knocked on the side of your head and you’re like trying to like, what’s that Mike Tyson quote? Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the face.
Like life is going to punch you in the freaking face and you better have some adaptability for when that happens and you better be able to pick yourself back up and like learn some things from that punch because otherwise you’re in for a rough ride because that’s not the only time it’s going to hit you. You know what I mean? So I like that you were able to just be like, okay, there’s a lot of things that I can’t control in my life that are going off, you know, off the rails a little bit, but like this is one thing I can kind of control and I can invest in myself and I can kind of follow this thread.
And I think that’s really cool that you were able to take that lesson in life and be like, I’m going to, I’m going to apply myself to this, like this craft. I think that’s amazing. I’m kind of forgetting my second point now.
Dang it. Come back to me. What else do you want to know, Giacomo?
I want you to be like the, the guide, the audience member in this, in this conversation of like, what do you want to keep finding out about Mel? Because she’s such a cool and, and multi-level layered person, you know, that we could never hope to explore all of the complexity in this one conversation. But I am curious what you think, what you’re, what you’re curious about.
[Giacomo]Well, I’m also interested in knowing what you’ve been up to nutritionally. What kind of changes have you made this past year? How did that impact your training?
How has that impacted your process as far as fueling yourself up for competition, but hopefully also impacting you lifestyle-wise? I know as an athlete, it can get tough to separate the two, right? You’re like, okay, well, I’m eating a certain way because it’s going to make me better.
And if I want to keep getting better and better and challenging myself, I need to keep improving and centering my nutrition around competing and being an athlete. And it makes sense, eat in an athlete-centered way. So I guess it’s a two-parter, right?
Do you eat only in an athlete-centered way? And if not, if you focus on enjoying your food outside of how you identify as an athlete, improving as an athlete, what’s that been like? How has your eating habits changed since you started working with Sawyer?
What was your intention going into this relationship to hiring a trainer?
[Mel]Sure. The nutrition part has been, that has been really interesting. So when I started powerlifting, I weighed about 130 pounds and had, and powerlifting is divided into weight classes as well as age classes.
And so I was thinking I was in this one particular weight class and things were fine and get to training and you train and you eat and you train and you eat. And I was trying to be pretty good about it. I’d done the reading and so forth and protein and was getting all sorts of calories in.
But yeah, the weight and the weight was coming up and coming up and coming up. And then on my first meet, I actually had a tough time getting down to the weight that I was supposed to be at for my class that I had registered at, which was a bit of a shock. And so it required a couple of days of liquids only before the competition.
And I decided I didn’t ever want to do that again. So had to kind of retool again as to being so different in terms of a strength athlete versus a running athlete. Running, you can eat all the time and the calories just all go away and so forth.
Strength-wise, you’re building muscle because mass moves mass. There’s no way to get around that. It’s physics.
And so when it feels good to move that heavy weight, you’re going to be heavier. So when I get hungry, no, I did not always eat according to an athlete. Not at all.
[Sawyer]I wouldn’t qualify that with the statement of a lot of powerlifters are not so focused on nutrition, at least from a quality standpoint. They’re more about just getting it in. I don’t think you were on the extreme end of that spectrum.
But I also think you were a lot more relaxed about nutrition than a lot of people can be. I thought you had a very good balance. You were not trying to just drive a bunch of food into you no matter what.
And you weren’t trying to not gain any fat when you were trying to achieve a strength goal. I thought you were pretty, at least from my point of view, pretty even-handed with like, OK, I’m not going to be a total extremist on either end. You were just like, OK, it looks like I need to go down a little bit.
And we were kind of having conversations periodically. And she was like, yeah, I went a little crazy with the nut butters this week or whatever. And I was like, that’s cool.
That’s fine. We just need to make sure we monitor her weight to stay in her weight class. And then once the competitions were done, she was more like, oh, now I want to kind of lean out a little bit.
It was not like an extreme anything, which I thought was really cool, that you had that ability to kind of just be normal about food and not be like, oh, I’m so locked in or, oh, I want to stay aesthetic no matter what. I felt like you had a very good, balanced way of looking at it.
[Mel]Again, over those two years, there was just such a dramatic change in my situation in general from being at one house with teenagers and kids and a family with that I had to cook for and so forth, to now being on my own, still have a teenager come in occasionally and so forth. But there’s a bit more of my own self-reliance there. I can plan things for myself specifically and not have to feel like I’m providing a sit-down dinner with the family all the time.
But then that also brought in when you start dating again and food becomes different. Because you’re going out and that discipline means not having a cheap meal, but it’s like, nope, this is just part of the plan. This is how I’m choosing to do my life and my nutrition at this point.
And making the choices that you are just conscious about.
[Sawyer]I think that was a great segue to kind of what I was going to say, and I forgot that point, which was that I feel like after the divorce, and obviously there were a couple of weeks there, a couple of months even, where, no, I think it was just a couple of weeks, honestly. You were pretty much, you transition very quickly. But once you were out of that house and onto your own adventure, I felt like that’s when you really hit your stride.
Like that’s, at least from my perception, was like, you were like, okay, now I can really lock in. I remember you were out of that house and you were telling me about that experience and I was like, whoa, that’s intense. But then shortly after that, you were just like, kind of feeling it, like you were just like looking around like, I can just kind of run now.
Like I don’t have anything kind of holding me back. And it was really cool to witness from my point of view, because I was able to see you really come into your own and like do what you wanted to do more of the time. And that was still like very athletically focused.
You liked training. You really liked being on this journey. And it was really cool to see you being able to do that.
But also like you were saying, dating again, having new life experiences and feeling like, whoa, like tickled by that too. You like came more alive, which was really cool to witness. So I just think that was such a cool thing to be able to see from a coach’s perspective is like the different life situations and how that translates to people having a season of like extreme growth or like kind of a little bit of stagnation before that.
Like I think usually things happen kind of cyclically, right? Like summer, fall, you know, summer, fall, winter, spring. There’s kind of a lot of seasons in life where things can kind of feel stagnant.
And no matter how badly you want something to change, it won’t until that kind of that camel or the straw breaks the camel’s back kind of thing, not a very vegan phrase, I know. But you kind of had that thing happen, that life event happened. And then all of a sudden it was like spring, you know what I mean?
And you just like grew, grew, grew in like a short amount of time. And that was really fun to be on that ride with you. So we were just like excited, like, you know, planning going back and forth and stuff.
So I just wanted to say that was really cool to witness from my perspective. And I think it’s really cool that you were able to just like take a situation and be like, okay, I’m going to relearn how to do certain things. But that’s actually kind of exciting because I felt stuck for a while.
And I don’t know, I don’t even know where I’m going with this. I was just really excited about that, that point.
[Mel]Yeah, that was a, you know, that whole transition over moving into a brand new place. It’s really scary, really tiring. But at the same time, you know, I was, so I’m going through this, doing a move.
And one of the things I was thinking of, you know, how grateful am I that I am this strong and can do this? And I’m not trying to move all of my things. Now, granted, I had movers and stuff like that.
But packing and putting everything together and stuff, it’s physically stressful. I thought, you know, I’m in really good shape. And just how grateful am I for that?
Because it would be even more tiring if I weren’t in great shape. And the chance to stock your cupboards and your refrigerator brand new.
[Sawyer]That and having your own career path. And you had your own career path and you had your training. You had so much going for you already.
And I think that’s something people always need to think about is like, it’s great to trust and be connected to somebody and have that kind of partnership. But if that ever doesn’t work, like you have to have your own stuff too. So I think it’s really cool that you’re kind of just like, I was, you were still living your life.
It was just kind of not working in one aspect. And then once that kind of broke away, you were still able to rely on all that other stuff to like, you know, turn and you could even invest more into it after a while, which was cool. Yeah.
Giacomo, carry us forward.
[Giacomo]We need, we need more questions to discuss. I am taking this all in. What is it?
Let’s lighten up the conversational. What is your favorite meal when you go out to eat on a date or in general? Maybe with your son, maybe on a date, maybe take yourself out to go somewhere.
What do you like to, what do you enjoy?
[Mel]So lately, so yeah, lately it’s the Mediterranean. So Mediterranean bowls tend to really, that’s the most filling for me. The most homey kind of, and the fella I’m seeing likes it, likes it too.
And he’s not, he’s not vegan, but there’s enough there for him to be able to eat. So that’s good. I’d love a good falafel.
[Sawyer]Yeah. And you’re in Texas too. So it’s probably not.
So you got to think about like, what are the places that just have them by default most of the time, right? But that’s cool.
[Giacomo]Okay. Texas, sorry. So do you get any sort of judgment or questions, curiosity, hopefully positive curiosity, but maybe not when it comes to you, you’re on a plant-based diet and you’re in the barbecue capital of the United States.
What is that like?
[Mel]Well, I’m in, I’m in Houston, just south of Houston, actually. So Houston, I think it’s one of the most cosmopolitan cities in the country. And it’s so diverse in all respects that, yeah, no one really cares.
Just for that. Because anybody could not be eating something or eating something for any one of a number of reasons. And maybe it’s, it’s also just Texas.
I’m not natively from Texas. I’ve been here about eight years now, I think something like that from Wisconsin, Wisconsin and Iowa. And here it’s just not, they’re just like, okay, whatever.
[Sawyer]Yeah. I would imagine it would not be the same case in the Midwest if that were, you know, the situation.
[Mel]Yeah, it’s a lot harder in the Midwest because there aren’t quite as many alternatives, but here, you know, like I was saying, there’s Mediterranean and there’s 16 different versions of Asian things and such here, as well as vegan. You’re just going to find everything here. And so it’s not as difficult.
[Giacomo]Cool. Okay. Here’s another question.
So like, what would you say to someone who is feeling fear or stressed out about their eating habits when it’s, they’re trying to either obtain a certain look or they’re trying to make a weight class or they’re trying to be routine and regimented about being nutritious and healthy and eating well and eating to be fitter and all that. And they’re having a hard time just not letting loose, making it so that going out to eat and having something that isn’t pre-planned or pre-programmed or even tracked, just a part of what they do. It might not be, obviously, it’s not what you’re going to do every day because you have goals and you need to be on track for your goals.
However, how do you, what do you say to someone who has a hard time embracing eating in a way where you also enjoy eating and being a little not 100% regimented and routine? What would you say to a person like that? Because you mentioned, you know, a little nut butter here, a little Mediterranean there, et cetera, et cetera.
And I feel like there’s been a shift for you this past year with not stressing about that stuff as much.
[Mel]Oh, yeah. Yeah. I think when I decided to stop beating myself up over choices that, you know, would they be 100% within plan?
No. Are they 80% within plan? Sure.
Okay. Well, great. If you think of taking a test and your child comes home with an 80% or a B or something like that, do you scold them for that score?
No, of course you wouldn’t because that’s not going to be encouraging. Why would you give the 80% that is good?
[Sawyer]Especially if they were trying, right? If they’re really doing their best and then you scold them, it’s like, it’s very, it’s a disincentive for them to try again. You know what I mean?
Because they’re like, well, I can’t impress this person. I can’t make them happy. So why would I try?
You know what I mean? So I like that analogy.
[Mel]Your own brain works the same way. If you’re constantly telling yourself, you did that bad, you made that mistake, you did this without seeing the things that you did do well, you’re going to lose internal motivation. I love to cook.
I don’t like to cook all the time, but I do love to cook. And if I’m cooking for someone, that’s really important to me. Having a meal with someone, yes, that’s really important to me.
So those things mean a lot within life too. I know I can do what I need to do to make a weight class if need be and kind of prove that just within the very first meat that I did. Did I like it?
No, absolutely not. So I also learned then, okay, look, that’s a bad choice. Let’s make it so that we don’t have to do that again.
But for this stage of my life and everything now, going out to eat with somebody is something I want to enjoy. And that’s just as important as what the scales of the next day.
[Sawyer]I think, like I said, I think you have a very healthy, balanced mindset about this. I would be remiss if I didn’t bring up the kind of lead up to the meat because I feel like that was a very significant point in your journey too. I mean, it really started when you realized you were within spitting distance of a record that you were like, nah, this just got real.
And I remember that moment and I was like, okay, she’s getting stressed out. And I remember just telling you, you need to call upon your team. You need everybody that’s your ally in this.
You need to be talking to consistently because if you bottle it up, it could destroy you. You know what I mean? And I hope that that was good advice.
But what was your perception from that moment? And then going forward, how did you deal with the pressure that you started to feel going into that meat where you knew you could set the regional records that you ended up doing?
[Mel]That was interesting to say. In a couple of months leading up to that, maybe two or three months leading up to that, my numbers were just on fire. They were just going up, up, up.
I was making PRs like every week and it was crazy. And I thought, okay, what? All right, what’s going on?
Cool. But wow. And my goal for the meat were specific numbers and then I surpassed them in training.
I thought, okay, well, I guess I’m going to have to adjust those now. Okay, cool. Didn’t think much of it.
My goal was to be able to qualify for USA Powerlifting Nationals. That’ll be in June. And they released some totals to come out.
And they were about right where I was at, say, January or so, a little bit later. But like, okay, if I execute according to plan, I should qualify for Nationals. And that’s kind of all I was thinking about.
I was looking around their rankings database one day and I saw the records for Texas and regional. Then for my age group and weight class, I’m like, wait a minute. I’m there already.
I’m there or above there already.
[Sawyer]You’re like, oh, my God. Obviously, it’s a good thing. It’s a good thing to be that strong.
But it’s also like, that’s a huge realization that you feel all this pressure all of a sudden. I remember when that happened, I was very like, okay, we need to talk. We need to block out all the noise and just talk about this.
Yeah.
[Mel]Because what went through my head was, how am I going to screw this up now? Am I going to blow? And this is going to, yeah.
How am I going to? No, you really can’t possibly be that. It all came out.
That is for sure.
[Sawyer]Yeah. Well, I think one thing we did do was we focused on the fact that you had the training really like we had made some good training changes, right? We put in some accessories that made sense.
We had to work on squat depth. We had to work on some other things, but you were very open to that and did it. And it seemed to work, which was great.
Again, we were being adaptable with that. But then from that point, like that couple of months out, we really started to lock in on mindset. And I think that’s what we, the majority of the time leading up to the competition was what we talked about was like the mindset.
What do you think were like the most helpful tips? Because I don’t want to go over everything we talked about, but like, what do you think were the most helpful things or not even tips that I gave, but things that you discovered and like things that you would tell somebody going into like a high pressure situation like that? I would love to hear what like worked for you.
[Mel]Having, yeah, when you said to rally everybody around you in terms of getting their support, that definitely helped because I probably wouldn’t have said anything to a lot of people if you hadn’t said, you know, this will help do that. Rally these folks. I would have been more inclined to, no, I’ll just keep it to myself.
That way, if it doesn’t happen and I’m not embarrassed or anything, you know, so on and so forth like that.
[Sawyer]Yeah. It almost feels like making a big deal out of like your birthday party or something, right? Like you’re like, yeah, look at me.
I’m so great. And it’s not what’s happening at all. You’re saying, hey, I really need your support right now.
Like I’m scared out of my mind, like, and you need to remember that you’re not trying to glorify yourself. And if people think that’s what you’re doing, then they don’t really get you anyway. So like, see ya, you know?
So I really like that you took that advice because I think that we just, when we feel like we’re in our weakest moments or like we’re scared or like you said, you thought you’re going to mess it up. You really need people around like all the time reminding you how impressive you are, how much you’ve worked for this, how they love you. Even if things don’t go according to plan, there’s so many things people can remind you of along that way.
And I knew that it was going to be a tall task for just me because it’s so much pressure at that point that I wanted more than just me rallying around you, you know, and I’m so here.
[Giacomo]No, no, go, go get support from somewhere else. I’m dead. This is way too much pressure on it.
Okay. All right.
[Sawyer]Allow me to explain myself to my boss right now before I get before I lose my job. I think I’m just kidding. I just think that it’s so it’s so hard.
It’s just like how you can’t get all your fulfillment in life from your romantic partner. Same kind of thing. Like you cannot just rely on one person, especially with our limited interactions.
You know, we’re only checking in once a week. Like how many thoughts happen in between that once a week? So I knew that kind of thing looming on the horizon and the closer it got, the more your brain was going to be like wigging out and being like, you can’t do this.
It’s too scary for this reason or that reason or whatever. So having people who kind of knew what you were doing and what you were in for and how important it was to you at the outset. I was like, she’s going to have more than just one voice reassuring.
And I felt like that was really. I’m really glad.
[Mel]And they do. And then and then you’d be surprised who around you wants to give you that support. My kids are great.
Of course, my son, the division two lacrosse player, and he’s no stranger to the weight room. And he was a good one for support like that. But at work, I still work remotely for a children’s hospital.
I’m in I.T. And so I let my teams know and they were like, oh, that’s awesome. So I was in a couple of the other folks in like the leadership and so forth where I’m working and let them know what’s going on. Headed to the meet that was up in Dallas.
So I took it five hours from where from where I live. And it was nice to get their little messages of encouragement, knowing that it’s still me doing it. But here’s some really positive voices.
And this is this is going to be something good. Funny story said when the meet was going on on a Friday, the women all lifted on Friday. My network at that time, I had given them the streaming links for the lift.
And one of the guys was watching was watching on there. And he said, wait, you’re not going to believe this. No, it’s on now.
And so during the leadership meeting for this children’s hospital, they’ve got a petition.
[Sawyer]And that’s quite so cute. Dude, Mel, I was actually I was in Costa Rica and watching on my laptop with like a I think I sent you a picture. It was like my laptop and then like Costa Rican rainforest in the background.
And I remember feeling I was very nervous for you, actually. I was I wasn’t going to tell you that. But I was feeling like like you were going up and I was like, Oh, why am I so nervous?
Like I was like, I was really in it. So I was but it was so cool to see you just like hit those numbers. And like I was just like freaking out.
And I was in the gym after shortly after that when you were doing I think the bench portion. And I was like checking every two seconds to see if you’re coming on because it was like a bunch of people going through and it was just such a cool experience to be rooting for somebody like that. So I love that you let more people have that experience of like cheering for you and like being excited for you because it’s like we all need that kind of not only do we need to receive that sometimes when it’s our moment to shine and like something we work towards, but like it’s fun to give that to you know what I mean to watch your it’s like, you know, how some crazy sports fans must feel when they have like a personal connection to a sports team. I guess I’ve never really understood that.
But I definitely understood like wanting to see you win because I knew you so well. I’m like what this meant to you. And it was so cool to be in that moment and like really give a shit about something and like get to see you win.
So it was like so thank you. I don’t even think I thanked you for that experience of like thanks for getting me into powerlifting so much because I’ve never watched a meet with such like thrill as I did that day, you know, so thank you for that.
[Mel]Oh, that’s great. Yeah, that was awesome. So we were texting and emailing during the during the meet and I didn’t you know, I didn’t have a team there really or anything.
I had my significant other was acting as my my handler and it’s kind of a new relationship. But but how about stressful situation here? Can you come be my handler?
I like that. I might achieve a record.
[Sawyer]Yeah, I like it.
[Mel]He came through with flying colors though. He did. He did great.
[Sawyer]And that’s excellent. Yeah, so we I mean, wow, we’ve been talking for almost an hour now. It feels like it’s been five minutes.
But Giacomo, how do you want to wrap this up? What do you think we should we should finish on the note of?
[Giacomo]The floor should be all Mel’s. What are your parting thoughts here? What would you like to share with our audience when it comes to facing adversity and still finding a way to not only meet your needs, but also find a way to rise, overcome and become the new best version of yourself?
Because to me, you’re living a whole new life right now. And you’re on a new high, accomplishing something that you could have only dreamed of only a few years ago, despite all of the challenges that have come your way. What would you say to somebody else who’s facing a similar circumstance?
[Mel]There’s a few things that really come to mind is that trust. Trust is key. Trust in yourself, trust in other people’s recommendations when you know they’re genuine, when they know they have your best interests at heart.
These things are. These things are all possible, may not materialize in the way that you put it in your head, essentially, might be better. Some things might not work as well, but it’s all still good in the end.
Some things that went through were not, you know, definitely not ideal and I’ve had to adapt a bunch. That’s what we do. That’s just always what we do.
If we’re not adapting, there isn’t much alternative. So trust yourself when you put together options in order to adapt. Don’t be afraid to adapt again.
It’s okay to put something down and pick up a different thing if that other thing wasn’t working. That’s just kind of key. And I think sometimes changing your approach, specifically like with athletics and weight lifting, it can be a very violent and aggressive type of, like when you start looking through all of the video shorts and the footage and that, it’s really very tough.
And I changed my mindset specifically when I got to those last couple of weeks before the meet where it was like, you know, jumping up and down and yelling and screaming, I got this. That’s not what I’m feeling right now. That’s not bringing me the energy, the feel that I want.
So like squats were kind of my nemesis, like Sawyer mentioned, I have trouble with depth and that. And so I was having this attitude of I have to beat the squat and I finally split it. And I’m like, no, I don’t have to beat the squat.
I have to work with the squat. I have to be with this bar. This bar is my teammate.
This is how this is. I’m going to approach this with joy because I want to do this. It’s making, it’s fun for me.
So instead of being aggressive with it, I took a different joyful, I guess, kind of approach to it. And then the squat started to click a little bit more. I just found what worked for me.
And yeah, it’s different for everybody.
[Sawyer]Yeah. I love how you said that in the last couple of weeks. That was totally your idea as far as I’m aware, because I didn’t say anything like that.
You just, I just remember you bringing that up in one of our calls where you were saying, like, I just, I got tired of treating it like an adversary and I wanted to just be more peaceful about it and more, more grateful for it. And like, you know, what it symbolized to you with the barbell and what the squat symbolized to you became different. And I think that that shift, that ability to do your own thing, even when the very vast majority of powerlifters are seeing it as like a, like a beast mode kind of activity and like an adversarial thing, you’re like, well, that didn’t feel like me.
And, you know, I think there are a lot of athletes where that’s the case, where they don’t survive or use their aggression to be better. They are very composed and very grateful to be there. I think there’s, there’s a lot to that.
So I think it’s really cool that you had that kind of serenity, even with all that chaos going around on around you and you were able to tap into it. I’m sure the nerves were going, I’m sure it was tempting to just like overdose on caffeine and just like try to, try to go crazy through it. But the fact that you, you kind of turned inward and did more like a meditative kind of approach, I think really worked out in your favor.
And so, you know, for anybody who is afraid to start their athletic journey because they’re just not an aggressive person or they don’t want to become that kind of a person, I think it’s a really great example to show people that that’s not the only route to becoming very athletically excellent is still be yourself and still approach things in a different way than the majority of people do and be successful or even just successful on your own thing. I think one thing I want to bring up before we go is just that a lot of the conversations we talked about at the last few weeks or like months was that, you know, you’ve already won basically.
And I think, I hope that that helped you like calm too, because it was like this, this, we had these conversations where I got myself emotional. I remember talking about why you would already won because in the people’s eyes who matter most to you, you’re already a badass. You’re already a winner.
You already show up for people in the ways that you need to, like your sons and things like that. Like they already think you’re incredible. And so for you to have the accolade and to impress strangers is cool and all that and probably good for business and whatever else, but you’re not even in the fitness business, so it doesn’t matter.
But, but so like the idea though, is like anybody who really matters in your life and who’s along for the ride for the long haul already thinks the world of you. So getting this accolade is cool and it’s validating, but it’s fleeting too. Like when you stop winning, those people will stop following, right?
And regardless of if you’re winning or losing, you’re going to have those people in your corner thinking you’re amazing. Those are the people that matter more in my opinion. And I think that having those reminders, I hope helped you just kind of tap into like this is for me and I’m just kind of doing this because I want to prove to myself that I’ve come a long way.
And you already have proven that time and time again. You prove that every time you train and you be, you know, PR and everything. So anyway, I’ll leave it at that.
I just thought that was really cool that you were able to like tap into that and like focus on what really mattered. And I think that’s one of the most amazing parts about competing in general is just like all the other noise in life kind of drowns out and you focus on what’s the most important thing when you’re feeling that kind of pressure, right? It’s almost like putting yourself in a survival situation or at least that’s what it feels like, I think.
At least it did for me, like competing growing up or being on stage or anything like that. I don’t really typically like that kind of pressure, but I definitely felt like it kind of removes all the background noise and you kind of focus on what really matters in life. I’m really glad that you had that experience and I’m really glad you came out on top.
I mean, that’s just such a cool thing to be able to say is you’re, you’re a record holder, you know?
[Mel]Yeah. Until someone else comes around and they said the one I beat was from 2015. So we’ll see who else shows up.
[Sawyer]You could have a 10-year reign, my friend. That would be cool.
[Mel]Who knows? Yeah. Never can tell.
That’s for sure. But yeah, we’ll see Nationals coming up and taking some time to enjoy life for a little bit here and then probably get back under the heavy weight again.
[Sawyer]We’ll ramp it up. We’ll ramp it up soon. But I’m glad you’re just living it up right now because you deserve to after a period of time like that.
Why don’t you take us home, sir? Yeah. Thanks so much guys for this, tapping into this kind of conversation.
We’re glad you guys were along for the ride. Hopefully you’re inspired as we are by Mel’s journey and everything she’s overcome. And thanks so much, Mel, for being here and sharing your wisdom with all of us.
It’s really cool to be a part of that too. So I just want to thank you on a personal note, like for letting me be along for the ride. Anyway, follow us on YouTube, on social media.
Please like us, give us a rating if you can. Giacomo, anything else you want to say?
[Giacomo]Sign us off. That’s it. Just find us at Muscles by Brussels and at Vegan Proteins.
And thanks so much for tuning into another episode. And we’ll talk to you soon. Okay.
Bye, guys.
